Seriously?

I just went a picked up some movie tickets.  There's a huge cardborad cut-out for the new remake of Total Recall.  The actor in the cut-out looks like Colin Farrell.  So I asked the kid selling tickets, "Hey, is that Colin Farrell?"  His answer, and I'm not kidding, was, "Oh, I wouldn't know."  Uh...if you don't know, buddy, who the hell would?  You work at a movie theater, for Christ's sake.  That's like going to a car dealer and asking, "Hey, what kind of car is that?" and the dealer responding, "Oh, I wouldn't know."  Are you going to buy a car from this guy? 

Nothing Worse...

There's a commercial playing on TV right now hyping the convenience of online postage.  A guy in the ad says, "There's nothing worse than waiting in line at the post office."  Really?  Nothing worse, huh?  How about herpes?  That's worse.  Or maybe finding out your wife's been cheating on you with your fatter, uglier best friend.  An IRS audit is worse.  A hangnail is worse.  Waiting in line for a ride at Disney World in high heat and ass-wilting humidity with a brood of screaming kids is worse.  Getting murdered by a psycho in a bunny mask is worse.  Road construction is worse.  A rogue comet slamming into the earth is worse.  Heck, even burning the roof of your mouth on too hot pizza is worse.  There are a million and one things worse than waiting in line at the post office...and watching stupid TV commercials is one of them.